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Hetero Buff World
Hello, I'm Ajay "Human wreaking ball" Cromwell, and I'm here to transform you from scrawny basement mold to King meathead. Now you're probably asking yourself: "Ajay, brother, how can I, as a loser, become an international astrohunk like you" Then I say: "Dude, you just have to be a natural, but with a little effort, and alot of advice from me, you CAN have those ripped abs, towering lats, and shattered pelvis!" Here are other questions that I, a man of big muscles, receive from withering wimps like YOU. And after them are wise HARDCORE answers that I conceive only during the deepest state of popping my hernia in and out of my gut while watching The Cosby Show.
Send your questions for Ajay to this email address: ioncoz@hotmail.com
Q&A
Q-Ajay, man, I'm so hopped up about joining the wonderful world of having big muscles and flexing in front of the mirror, but I... don't know where to start! A couple of friends invited me to join them at the gym, and I'm thinking about it. But, I'd like to know your
input on the whole situation.
A-Now, James, I have to be honest outright and tell you that gyms are a waste of time. Don't listen to your friends, they are most likely plotting to stop you from being a
successful bodybuilder and sodomize your baseball card collection. However, you can get bloody cut twice as fast from the comfort of your own home! Here's just one of the MANY exercises that I have designed.
Rock hard bicep curls: Take one fist sized rock to start off (don't worry if it isn't heavy, you'll be lifting bigger rocks soon). Lubricate it with butter. Now this has a double purpose: first, it will make the rock much easier to handle, and increase its conductivity. By conductivity, I mean it will enhance your bond with the rock god, Aquaman. Of course you don't know this, but the rock's essence does actually travel into your body to give you actual rocks in your muscles. Thus you get rock hard biceps. With one hand or two hands, lift it from your groin area all the way above your head. Keep your elbows flexed at all times! This will force the hamstrings in your arms into "passive insecurity", so you only work the actual biceps. Repeat this lifting
maneuver 50 times, and, when you feel you're ready, begin hurling the rock into the air and catching it. This is called
power lifting, and increases the your power level and libido.
Follow this sage advice and you'll be king buff in no time!
........
Q-I question your credentials AND sexuality.
A-I am an expert at being ripped and am 100% straight, but I'll let my picture do the talking.
